~Pankhudi

~Pankhudi

Should I call it chaos or peace?

Not sure if it was a state of shock or discomfort. The ambience was full of noise made by the text reading software. Some 2-3 old dysfunctional computers were lying in the corner. It was a small computer lab with old paint covering the wall. The light although dim, was enough to penetrate every corner of the room. I took a deep breath and walked to one of the six terminals spread around the room.

"Type properly Renuka... put your index fingers on F and J".

She frowned... looked back at me, spoke something in kannada and got back to typing... but this time properly... She knows it, just that she is a naughty little kid.

Don't know why but it unsettled me when she looked back at me. Somehow I feel uncomfortable in looking eye to eye at her . Well.. actually all of them. I walked past her to the next terminal where Sheela was sitting. The whole notepad was full of text patterns from lesson 2, lesson 3 and some self made tests. She looked bored.

"Sheela do the lesson 1"

"Ok sir". She said dryly and started typing asdf. By the time I looked back at her screen, she was done with the lesson and was back into her self made random tests. I decided not to disturb her again.

From outside the door students from class 9th were peeking into the room.

peeking?

The one hour was over and we started puling out the kids from the chair as they extended their hands to type one last alphabet. As if this was the last day they ever turned up into this room. As they left, I took a deep breath. And before I could breathe out, the next batch was in.

Alongwith them came Joseph sir and Sharada. Looking bright as ever. Joseph sir wears dark glasses. Sharada is ambitious and she was looking for a job in some firm. She knows MS Office and Internet. I couldn't continue the talks for long. Ganesh and Anusha talked with them and they walked out for some discussion. And I closed my eyes, walked towards the door only to stumble upon a chair.

"Sir... are you okay?" Sandeep is another bright and ambitious kid. He works harder and harder to learn all his lessons. And it again unsettles me when I look at him eye to eye.

This was my first day at SRMAB. I have spent 12 years at a school. But this school is different. Here the interaction between a teacher and students is totally skewed. I speak hindi, they speak kannada. I write in ink, they make patterned pinholes. I read english/hindi, they read braille. I see, they...

And as our classes got over I walked out fresh... The three hours of non-stop noise by JAWS software seemed to be music now. And as I started walking out, Chetan ran out through the zigzag corridor dodging the walls, straight into the playground. I stopped... this couldnot have been for real. I closed my eyes and started walking only to crash over a stone. I had hurt myself. The shock was still on. As I walked outside the school premises, I took a deep breath. I looked back at the school gate. I recalled few other times I had looked back at the gate of some other places... TajMahal in wonder, Appu Ghar as a kid in awe, College in nostalgia... And this time it is SRMAB in confusion. Confusion over why did I find peace in noise, why was it refreshing to run around the terminals directing kids on what to do, and why was I shocked...

Its been 2 years now. And I have seen many normal things happening here in this world. Joseph Sir once showed me the new computer lab. He walked the whole complicated distance on his own without seeking any help and later helped me by telling that Ganesh had arrived. I had to walk out of room to spot him and know that he was there. Sometimes our eyes cripple us. We need to see things to believe in them. It doesn't work that way in this world.

I was supposed to teach. But I think what I learnt was way ahead of what I taught there. The shock is gone. And I know what used to unsettle me. It was their confidence. The shine on their face. The fire to accept any challenge.

It feels like I have opened my eyes now... for the first time. And those kids helped me do that.

And I think I should call it peace. Cause it helped me discount the chaos of my life.

I have gone into hibernation in Pankhudi ever since I left Bangalore. Theres a lot of work to be done and its waiting for me. Its time I worked to nurture Pankhudi Kolkata into a full grown chapter. And its time when you as my readers also thought about it. Not as a passing thought but as a reason. Reason to...

live a meaningful life maybe?

~The kids I talked about can now write letters in MS Word, do calculation in MS Excel and make Power Point Presentations
~http://www.pankhudifoundation.org/Join.html
~Drop me a line if you want to know more about us. We function at Bangalore, Pune, Delhi, Mumbai, Hyderabad and Kolkata. You can also help us start a new chapter