Ashes of my Old Life

Ashes of my Old Life

midnight... outer ring road... I was returning on my bike from a wedding. And I had too many things on my mind. Too many pictures flashing in my head.

I have been in Bangalore for 4 years now. Why was I feeling so awkward at the wedding.
So many friends are getting married. Why is everything feeling like the movies for last 10 months.

Why is that car speeding up towards me?

Why.....

Its funny to be run over by a vehicle. You bleed and people gather around screaming at the pool of your blood. And all you want to do is to lie on the road and rest.

The car seems to be running away. Gosh I am bleeding.

Its been a year now. I am just out of that place. I guess it was a hospital. I was in coma for a year. People say I have lost a bit of weight. And I have lost my old job. Although this new i-banking stuff feels better than the old code the same shit again and again and play TT to flush it out. But i anyways liked that old shit too for things other than the coding shit.

Yes you are allowed to dream when you are in coma. And I also had a long dream.... As if it were for real. I could feel it, and live in it. It felt as if I am living a second life. Time seemed to have rolled back by 4 years. Or run too far ahead. Not sure where this dream fitted in the time line of my life. New city, new people, new life, studies at an awesome school. A bittersweet stint.

And now, I am wide awake. Back to the same world. Initially it felt like I was back from a week's holidays and had to join office on monday. Bangalore hasn't changed. Cities take time and revolutions to change. And Bangalore has recently had its revolution. But people do change. Roles get switched in a year. A friend circle that broke because of weddings and commitments gets replaced by another friend circle, bound to break in next 3-4 years.

I changed in the year and so did others. Most have got busy in their own lives. But I think the year was a nice break. Or perhaps I should say this internship is a nice break. From my new life to the ashes of my old life.

And I am happy that I got a chance to visit Bangalore again. I could rubbish the feeling I had when I was moving out... That I wouldn't want to come back to this place again. That's what I was feeling when I was lying on that road that day before I went into coma.... with mind full of thoughts... bleeding... .

P.S.: Treat this as a work of fiction. I would disappoint you if you come and ask me how it feels to be in coma.... I already disappointed many.